Eyes Lifted Up

I lift my eyes to the hills- where does my help come from?
My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. ~Psalm 121:1-2 (NIV)

For the past 14 years, health struggles have been a major part of my life.  There have been good periods, good days, but physical limitations and uncertainties have been the norm.

Producing multifarious symptoms, one of the main struggles has been with my thyroid. For the last nine months, the thyroid struggle has been pretty intense. Seemingly, this body was being assaulted by every thyroid-related symptom previously experienced, as well as some new encounters.  To name a few: severe weakness and a heavy brain fog -- some days, it was as if my mind was almost blank, hardly a thought, no energy to form a thought.   Many, many days, I have had absolutely nothing to give.

I was physically experiencing what I knew spiritually -- that I had nothing to give to God.  To realize that you have nothing to give to God and yet to give Him everything you have, this is quite a paradox.  Everything comes from God: there is nothing that I have that was not graciously given to me by God, but nothing I have is needed by God.  His desire that I give myself back to Him is for my benefit not His.  For as I abandon myself to God and give back to Him everything that He has given, He gives more grace.  It could be said that the portion of grace is doubled.  For as I realize that He is my portion, I inherit the full portion that He desires to bestow upon me.

I have seen this in such a remarkable way in the last few months.  I love to read God's Word, but to even read a Psalm has been a supreme effort - at some points throughout the day, to pray, a mighty task.  Many days, all I could do was just look up -- Look to the hills from where my help comes.  Beautifully, each and every day the grace to get through that day, the grace to look up, was there.  God knew my heart and He lifted my eyes when I could not do this for myself.  That is the beauty of abandonment, of a surrendered life: we see ourselves for who we truly are -- realizing we are nothing apart from God, we offer the reins of our life to the One who truly knows what is needed, and He takes over and accomplishes all that needs to be accomplished.

God's grace is ever sufficient.  He takes nothing and makes it into something.  I do not know all the somethings that He is making within me, but even in the last few weeks He showed me that He was making something out of nothing: For years my hair has been growing -- growing -- I did not cut it, just let it grow.  Then two weeks ago, I had it cut -- 17" cut -- for donation.  You see, this body that has been so wasted was still endowed with something to give.  It may sound small, but it was huge to me...Sufficient grace, sufficient in wisdom and supply, sufficient to produce a gift from what the locusts have devoured.

As we look up to Him, His grace is constantly renewing us from within, making a new thing, producing a good gift.  All appearances may show a very contrary picture to true reality -- do we believe that our Maker knows what is best even when every outside indicator says that we have been cast aside?  Do we believe that He is producing a good thing even when production cannot be measured by human standards?  We can rest assured that fruit will always be produced from a surrendered life -- are we willing to allow God to enable our eyes to see the fruit that He is producing or will we stubbornly refuse the fruit that does not meet our hopes and expectations?  Will we keep looking up even when we are scared of what we might see?  We must, for as we do, Grace will be waiting to give more Grace.

Conformed to Transformed:Christ-minded on Purpose

...the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you. ~ John 14:26, NIV

Christ-conscious instead of self-conscious, Christ-minded instead of flesh-minded -- this has become the desire of my heart.  I am impoverished, unable to make this my reality.  Thankfully, this desire originated from God.  He has promised that the Spirit, who lives within me, will bring Christ's words to my mind.  Though I am powerless to change myself, I do have a role -- I must read, meditate on and memorize God's words.  I must make a deliberate choice to believe His thoughts over my own thoughts.

In every moment, in every situation, I have a choice: will I believe what God says or will I believe what my flesh says?

For the majority of my adult life, I have struggled with illness.  Because of this, I have often felt like my life was void of significant purpose.  These thoughts were untrue, but I believed them -- allowing them to rule my mind and crush my spirit.  Through time in God's Word and answered pleas for understanding, my outlook was adjusted; the Spirit helped me discern God's thoughts on the situation and flesh-minded was replaced with Christ-minded.

Am I still taunted by these flesh-minded thoughts?  Absolutely.  But the Spirit has shown me what is true. Each time these thoughts taunt, I can choose to believe what He has revealed to me instead of the fleshly thoughts that desire to defeat me.

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Below are some of the flesh-minded thoughts that have deceived me along with the Christ-minded thoughts that have freed me:

Flesh-minded Thought:
"Some days I am too weak to even do the small things around my house, perhaps the Lord has put me on the shelf...perhaps He no longer desires to use me."

Christ-minded Thought:
...he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. ~Philippians 1:6 (NIV)

Flesh-minded Thought:
"Because I do not have a big life, my life lacks purpose."

Christ-minded Thoughts:
"We are meant to be...the common stuff of ordinary life exhibiting the marvel of the grace of God." ~Oswald Chambers, My Utmost For His Highest

For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them. ~Ephesians 2:8-10 (NASB)

Flesh-minded Thought:
"My day-to-day is filled with the mundane. I have such a small life; my life is lacking in value."

Christ-minded Thoughts:
But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light." ~I Peter 2:9 (NIV)

"As we surrender every moment to our loving Lord, even the most mundane task is marked by the musical accompaniment of His pleasure." ~CDS

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"Add to the Beauty", by Sara Groves, is one of my favorite songs.  The first verse and chorus of this song says:

~We come with beautiful secrets.  We come with purpose that's written on our hearts,
written on our souls.  We come to every new morning with possibilities only we can hold, that only we can hold. Redemption comes in strange places, small spaces, calling out the best of who we are...and I want to add to the beauty, I want to tell a better story, shine with the light that's burning up inside~

I cannot think of a more beautiful way to honor the Lord this Christmas -- and every day -- than by surrendering to what He desires for my life, beginning with my very thoughts.  As I do, the beauty that He has in store for me will be revealed and the possibilities that only I can hold will become reality.

May your Christmas celebration be filled with His beauty~





From time to time in the next weeks and months, I will continue this Conformed to Transformed Series, sharing the Christ-minded thoughts that are little by little, moment by moment, replacing my flesh-minded thoughts.

Conformed to Transformed, Part III

The definitions of our life are manifested through our actions – this includes our reactions. The foundation of our expectations is betrayed by how we respond to the hurts and disappointments of this life. Are our expectations grounded in truth or are they motivated by a desire for our own way? Are we consistently coveting a different scenario than the one that God has allowed in our life? Though our covetous flesh will not die graciously, God’s gracious provision of truth can conquer our selfish motivations.

II Peter 1:3-4 tells us that the divine power of God, through Jesus Christ, “…has granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness, through the true knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and excellence. For by these He has granted to us His precious and magnificent promises, so that by them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world by lust.” (NASB)

A life built upon the deception of self-gratification is a life conformed to the world, but a life built upon the true knowledge of God is a transformed life.

As we fill our minds with truth, the definitions of our life -- our very belief-structure -- will be rebuilt. To say our belief-structure is being rebuilt is another way of describing the renewal of our minds. The rebuilding of our belief-structure (renewing of our minds) is the practical process of realigning our thoughts with God’s truth.

Realigning ourselves with God’s truth is a constant process. The moment our expectations show any sign of covetousness, we must realign ourselves with the truth of God’s Word. If we are consistently in God’s Word, the Spirit will begin to bring truth to our minds, but these moments will be equally filled with the bombardment of self-gratifying and self-defending thoughts. It is right then that we need to stop and realign ourselves with God’s truth.

Proverbs 3:5-6 is a perfect outline to help with the realigning process, it says: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.” (NASB)

I cannot tell you how much these verses have helped me.  As a child, I memorized these verses. I know them as well as my own name, but they have not always impacted me as they do now.  When the phrase in all your ways acknowledge Him really sunk into my heart, it changed everything for me.  A light bulb went off in my head:  In order to acknowledge God above my own understanding, my feelings, emotions, expectations, motivations, and intuitions need to be realigned with God's truth.

II Corinthians 10:5 describes the realigning process in a powerful way.  It says that "arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God" need to be demolished and every thought needs to be taken captive that it might be obedient to Christ.

To acknowledge God above my own understanding is not a natural inclination, it is a deliberate action.

The first step toward realignment is to recognize thoughts that are not based upon God's truth.  Am I coveting a different scenario than the one God has allowed?  What is fueling my actions and reactions, fleshly expectations and motivations or God's truth?   As soon as a faulty thought process is recognized, admit that in this moment, your path, or thought, is not straight; it is filled with distraction and deception rather than being focused on truth.

The second step is to ask Christ to be your support; tell Him that you do not want your own understanding, emotions or feelings to be your source of support. Ask the Shepherd and Overseer of your soul to help you trust Him.

Finally, acknowledge God’s truth and dwell on His character. Allow yourself to praise Him, not only for who He is, but also for what He is going to do through you. Speak His Word to yourself and to Him.

For instance, when someone has done or said something hurtful, my automatic reaction is not one of love and understanding.  I want to defend myself.  Sometimes, I pull away, shrinking inside myself rather than reaching out in kindness.  Other times, I want to lash out and say something hurtful in return.  But I have come to understand that the Lord wants me to stop and allow Him to take control of my thoughts so that He can reign in my actions.  I am learning to stop and talk to Him before I render any kind of response.

I will often pray something like this: Lord, I know that your Word says that your plans for me are good, but right now this situation hurts – it feels evil – yet, I know that even when others mean something as evil, your intentions toward me are good. You are faithful. I, too, want to be faithful to you. I want your beauty and faithfulness to be on display rather than my selfishness. I trust what you have allowed. I know that this situation is an opportunity to portray truth. You are my Lord and I bow to what you desire to do in and through me. May your truth reign in me. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

No matter the scenario, as soon as I surrender my thoughts to Christ, submitting to His truth over my own way, my focus is shifted and the bombardment of the moment begins to diminish. By acknowledging God’s way as the only right way, I am declaring the Lordship and authority of Christ over my heart. Self-preservation is no longer my objective; rather my aim is that Christ's truth be evidenced through my life.

Though this realigning process is constant and deliberate, it is not about perfection. Perfection is not the goal, nor is it attainable on this earth. Realignment is about Christ-mindedness which produces Christ-likeness.

When God-appointed words flow from my lips, when forgiveness is freely given, when grace is offered instead of judgment, when joy and praise fill my heart though illness overtakes my body -- this is glorious transformation.  Though I have done nothing to deserve such a priceless inheritance, in Christ, it is mine.

Conformed to Transformed, Part II

My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness;
I dare not trust the sweetest frame, but wholly lean on Jesus’ name.
When darkness veils His lovely face, I rest on His unchanging grace;
In every high and stormy gale, my anchor holds within the veil.
His oath, His covenant, His blood support me in the whelming flood;
When all around my soul gives way, He then is all my hope and stay.
When He shall come with trumpet sound, Oh, may I then in Him be found;
Dressed in His righteousness alone, faultless to stand before the throne.
On Christ, the Solid Rock, I stand; all other ground is sinking sand, all other ground is
sinking sand. (Edward Mote and William B. Bradbury, The Solid Rock, Public Domain).

When I began reading God's Word to understand Him, I was asking Him to define Himself to me.  Instead of coming to His Word with my own expectations and definitions, I came to His Word with nothing.  Nothing but a heart that wanted to understand, that wanted to be changed, that wanted to know Him.

Up to that point, my life had been built on an unstable foundation.  It was unstable because it was built on a belief system that was not totally based on God's truth.  I had come to my own conclusions about God, about how He should do things in my life.  Because of this, much of my life was built on misconception, thus on sinking sand.  My life needed to be built, as the song says, on "nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness".

I recognized how much I needed God, but solitary recognition of my own poverty of spirit was not enough.  My spirit wanted to be controlled by God's Spirit, my flesh did not.

The flesh, striving for control, coddles our feelings and strokes our pride.   The flesh flaunts assets, virtues and ideas, telling us that we are self-sufficient, that we are good, that we need to live for ourselves.  But God alone is good, there is nothing good within us.  Once we are in Christ, our life is not our own.  The voice of our flesh should not be our guide, but when we live for our own definitions and expectations, our flesh is our guide.  Recognition of faulty definitions and expectations is a necessary starting point, but we must go a step further: our definitions need to be replaced with God's definitions.

Romans 12:2 says: "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind..." (NIV)   We are conformed to whatever we believe.  What we believe shapes us, defines us.

Our flesh is conformed to the pattern of the world, it is built on the foundation of sin and self-gratification.  Our fleshly instinct is service to the flesh, but because we are in Christ, we no longer have to fear or serve the flesh.  The Spirit will enable us to live in His power and deny the flesh.  Yet we must understand that the flesh will not die graciously, it does not want to surrender power.  The flesh will constantly try to raise the scepter of its power and get back its control. In order for the Spirit to rule our flesh, we must conform (align ourselves) to God's truth instead of our own fleshly definitions and instincts.  Every definition of our life must be built on "nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness."

More than anything, I want to be controlled by God's Spirit.  As I believe God over my own feelings, emotions and expectations, my mind is slowly but surely being renewed: flesh-minded is becoming Christ-minded.



Part III will soon follow...

Conformed to Transformed, Part I

May the God of peace, who through the blood of the eternal covenant brought back from the dead our Lord Jesus, the great Shepherd of the sheep, equip you with everything good for doing his will, and may he work in us what is pleasing to him, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen.  ~Hebrews 13:20-21 (NIV)

To many, the Bible is seen as a bunch of rules and regulations and the Christian life about following those rules and regulations.  When in reality, the Bible is a description of who God is and what He desires to do for anyone who would believe Him.  The Christian life is not about rules and regulations but about relationship with a loving and just God.  God pursues man that He might give something to him which will fulfill and transform -- Himself.

I have known God since the age of 5, at which time I accepted the gift of redemption offered by Him through His Son.  I have no memory of life without God.  I memorized His Word, but did not always understand His Word.  I desired to serve the Lord, but did not always know what that meant.  I read God's Word but, when it came to meaning, I usually accepted the explanations of others.

I did have a relationship with God.  I talked to Him.  In so many ways, I trusted Him.  He was everything to me, yet I did not realize that He was everything to me on my own terms.  My life was about what I could give to Him, about doing for Him -- and then, due to illness, it came to the point that there was nothing I could do for Him.  I had nothing to offer, no strength, no ability, nothing...and I was broken.  Lonely. Scared. Confused.  Disillusioned.  I was filled with doubt, filled with questions.  Who was this God who allowed extended times of physical, emotional and material loss without any sign of relief?

Like Jacob, I struggled with God. (Genesis 32:22-31)  Though I was scared, confused and disillusioned, I kept crying out to God, kept holding on to Him.  I began reading His Word to understand Him.  Little by little, focus was shifted from my circumstances to the One who wanted me to know Him.  The eyes of my heart were opened to the unseen, to the eternal.  For the first time in my life I realized that I never had anything to offer God, there was nothing I could give to Him, nothing that He needed from me.  "Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven." (Matthew 5:3 NIV)

As I adhered to God, as I sought Him as the only Source for life and godliness, my heart was truly ready for both fulfillment and transformation.



Part II will soon follow...

A Master Treasure Hunter

But whatever things were gain to me, those things I have counted as loss for the sake of Christ. More than that, I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them but rubbish so that I may gain Christ... Philippians 3:7-8 (NASB)

I love watching Antiques Roadshow. To me, it is exciting to see what people find at garage sales and flea markets. I laugh with them as they find out that their $2.00 find is actually worth $2,000. They found treasure! In one way or another, all of us are treasure hunters. It is a thrill to pay next to nothing for an item that is really worth something. But sometimes the thrill of treasure hunting taints our outlook. When we find that we can get something for almost nothing, we begin to think that greater effort or investment should bring a higher margin of reward. Pretty soon, we begin to apply this outlook to every part of our lives, even our service to Christ. We tithe - we expect God to increase what we have. We sacrifice our time - we feel that God should reward us for our sacrifice. We expect our service to reap dividends of blessing and for the most part, the blessings being sought are material and physical.

In Job 8:5, in the midst of Job's intense suffering, Bildad said these words to him: "...if you pray to God and seek the favor of the Almighty, if you are pure and live with complete integrity, he will rise up and restore your happy home."(NLT) Bildad felt that if Job was really serving God and doing what He desired then Job would not know his current suffering. In his own way, Bildad was a treasure hunter. He expected godly living to reap material benefit. How much do our expectations line up with a Bildad-view of blessing? In some ways, do we want the material and physical reward so that others will see it and say that our life is blessed? Or, do we just think that we deserve material and physical reward? Is material reward the only thing that makes service to Christ worth it?

If our focus is on external benefit -- in suffering: release, in sacrifice: reward, in ministry: praise -- then our service is to ourselves. Such a description does not define a bond-servant or true friend of Christ.

Philippians 3:7-8 shows us that Paul did not agree with Bildad's outlook. Paul had known the deepest of suffering and yet he did not see this suffering as a lack of blessing. On the contrary, he saw the suffering itself as blessing. Why? Because he entrusted his entire life to God. He knew that anything that God allowed in his life was to bring about the greatest of treasure: deeper relationship with Christ which would enable him to be made into the image of Christ. Yes, Paul was a treasure hunter, but his treasure was not financial gain, physical blessing or release from suffering, Paul's treasure was Jesus Christ -- his greatest pursuit was to know Christ more.

External reward will deteriorate, but true friendship with Christ is an eternal treasure which will never depreciate. Paul, like any good treasure hunter, knew that consistent appreciation is the most coveted characteristic in treasure. Actually, Paul was not just a good treasure hunter, he was a Master treasure hunter. He sought the lasting treasure of his Master, Jesus Christ.

~Lord, you know I love a good bargain. I want to be a good steward of all that you have given me, but I do not want to look for external treasures at the expense of eternal treasures. May lasting treasure be the focus of my life. I want to be a Master treasure hunter. In Jesus' Name, Amen~

Words Fitly Spoken

A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver.
~Proverbs 25:11 (KJV)

In the third testament, Malcolm Muggeridge says of Saint Augustine: "Augustine was so aware of the universality of God's love and presence that he could easily communicate with all sorts and conditions of men."

This statement gives hope, for I desire to easily communicate with all sorts and conditions of men. I realize that my faith in God's love, His working out His will in me and my yielding to it, is the vehicle by which this becomes a reality. Faith in God's love - a love that has no evil in it, a love that will go to any length to make me like His Son - is the prompt of His leading in both word and deed.

Such faith in God's love produces an abundance that fulfills and stimulates a thirst for more of everything that God desires to bestow. This thirst (seeking) for more of God's abundance is what Mark 9:50 refers to when it says, "Have salt in yourselves, and be at peace with each other." Salt in yourselves is a constant desire for righteousness, a consistent thirst for more of Christ.

This thirst for more of Christ will have an impact on every moment, word and deed of your life, for yielded lives are Christ-empowered lives. Your saltiness, or thirst for Christ, will impact others. To some, it will be a source of thirst, leading them to thirst for Christ (or thirst more for Christ). For others, such saltiness will repel, yet seeds of salt will be planted.

Words fitly spoken -- words suited for every occasion (for all sorts and conditions of men) -- result from yielded, salty, lives. Christ knows the words which need to be spoken. As we trust Him and surrender mind and heart to His full command, we become salt-dispensers and His salty words of life are spoken through us.